How would you feel?

[Kvat3r]

My boyfriend has a really close relationship with his sister in law. In fact it's close to the point it is awkward, to me anyway. When we leave from going over to his brothers house they hug for like a minute...STRANGE. And she is always calling him to go places with JUST her. Yesterday he went to target with her, and he said she was checking to see if he is tickelish. OH.. OK. Hmmm. I kinda feel like Ken has always had a crush on her, but of coarse she is married to HIS BROTHER. Last night he said something that really hurt me....but I would really rather not elaborate on this. Do you think this is odd? Do I have the right to tell him, I dont want him hanging out with her? Please help..I am sure he would think it odd, if this was my BROTHER IN LAW. I just dont get people sometimes.

[wife]

I have a couple of questions..

is she much older than your bf?
how does her husband feel about it?

Ok here are my feelings, I think she likes to flirt and enjoys the attention, esp if he flirts back. If this were my husband I would ask him not to go and as his wife I have the right to.
If it were my boyfriend I would tell him that it makes me uncomfortable and ask him how he would feel if his brother tried to find your tickle spot and wanted to take just you to dinner.
Warning, he could get defensive...but usually that is a sign that something deeper may be involved. It could be that yes he has a crush on her, etc. But I don't think I could be with someone who had a crush on someone else. But that is me

[ByHisGrace]

This is definitely odd. I think they have chemistry with each other. Beware, if you get married to him don't expect this to just go away. Why doesn't his brother notice any of this? I could never see my younger brother behaving this way with my older brother's wife. He definitely likes her and she likes him, it's too obvious. Hugging too long, tickling, going out shopping together. They are doing things that appear innocent but they're really playing with fire. They're not far from sharing a innocent peck on the lips.....and so on.

Your boyfriend needs to be more into you. I don't know what he said that was so hurtful but just consider it another *huge* red flag.

[lisa]

Your boyfriend needs to be more into you. I don't know what he said that was so hurtful but just consider it another *huge* red flag.

:agree

:hug HUGE red flags.

[Betty]

Does she flirt with others or just your husband? My husband's brother's ex flirted with all the guys in the family. Even sat on their laps. Lucky for me, my husband found her foul mouth and her behavior crude.
I would insist on going with them from now on. If nothing else your husband should be told that him spending so much time with his brother's wife is offensive to both you and his brother.

[Biblenuggetlady]

Red flags for sure...the inappropriate boundaries he has with his SIL, and the comment that hurt your feelings. Don't ignore these, especially if you are thinking of marrying.

[yeshua'sbride]

:ohno Not good, dear. Not good at all. :ohno

[Kvat3r]

I have a couple of questions..

is she much older than your bf?
how does her husband feel about it?

Ok here are my feelings, I think she likes to flirt and enjoys the attention, esp if he flirts back. If this were my husband I would ask him not to go and as his wife I have the right to.
If it were my boyfriend I would tell him that it makes me uncomfortable and ask him how he would feel if his brother tried to find your tickle spot and wanted to take just you to dinner.
Warning, he could get defensive...but usually that is a sign that something deeper may be involved. It could be that yes he has a crush on her, etc. But I don't think I could be with someone who had a crush on someone else. But that is me
No, she is a few years younger than my boyfriend. Her husband seems to feel fine about it as far as I know. I dont really know her husband very well. I do feel as though she feeds off of the attention she gets from Kenny, and before Kenny met me, they spent alot more time together than they do now that we've been together. I asked him flat out last night ...I said "Can I ask you a question Kenny?" And he said "sure" I said " You have always had a crush on meghan huh?" and he said "NO, I love you". and he kept saying I am sorry, I am sorry, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings" I am at work today...and usually he sends me a text message to say Hi, and it's usually about 11am. But today he sent me a message at about 8am, so I know he knows that I am feeling a bit insecure about this whole situation. I am going to have a talk with him today, and let him know that I am not having this. And I am going to say it in a way that he will be able to understand how it would feel if it was ME doing this to him. Thank you for all of the advice. It's nice to know that I am not crazy! Any more advice would be appreciated.

[wife]

I am glad that you talked. It is good that he understands how you feel. I will keep you in my prayers for tonight