PiC
February 6th, 2008, 10:11 PM
So, tonight, being touched by a devotion I read, got on my knees and prayed that all the mistakes of my past would be tied down and destroyed, and that God would be with me through my troubles always. See, I've done some pretty stupid things that have haunted me for a long time. First going into puberty while at the same time first going on the internet, I started to become attracted to girls. And apparently, girls on the internet at all ages HUNT boys so they can be payed attention to and adored. I was a clueless bum back then who didn't know any better, so I eventually caught myself in a relationship with a female two years older than me.
It played out like a soap opera. Another evil temptress lured me away from the first girl, leading to her unbridled rage. Now, all the foolishness died down and passed away eventually, but my idiocy haunted me to this day to the point I couldn't stand it at all. So I prayed that God would take it and eliminate it. After I was finished praying, my mind bounced here and there for a very long time, filling with fear, and thoughts AGAINST God, immediately countered by thoughts FOR God. It was like I knew the right side of the argument, but I was still confused. Eventually, my mind settled at peace and all the fear and bad thoughts drifted away. The conclusion?
I felt like it had to be a real spiritual war between God and Satan, or angels and demons, for my heart. A battle that occured invisibly right there and then, considering the conflicting opinions that bounced to and fro. But I want to praise and thank God for deflecting Satan and destroying my fear. And I'd like to ask for YOUR prayers that it can stay that way.
Thanks very much.
It played out like a soap opera. Another evil temptress lured me away from the first girl, leading to her unbridled rage. Now, all the foolishness died down and passed away eventually, but my idiocy haunted me to this day to the point I couldn't stand it at all. So I prayed that God would take it and eliminate it. After I was finished praying, my mind bounced here and there for a very long time, filling with fear, and thoughts AGAINST God, immediately countered by thoughts FOR God. It was like I knew the right side of the argument, but I was still confused. Eventually, my mind settled at peace and all the fear and bad thoughts drifted away. The conclusion?
I felt like it had to be a real spiritual war between God and Satan, or angels and demons, for my heart. A battle that occured invisibly right there and then, considering the conflicting opinions that bounced to and fro. But I want to praise and thank God for deflecting Satan and destroying my fear. And I'd like to ask for YOUR prayers that it can stay that way.
Thanks very much.