How for Men Not to Get Hurt When Dealing with Menopausal Women

[Dee]

How about a fun thread where we can all discuss those nuclear hot flashes and funny stories? We all have them.

I'll go first....................

When you see a woman driving a big old Hummer 1 with her window down and her head hanging out like a dog in 17 degree weather whatever you do don't laugh at her. Don't shout any smart remarks. She might be having a nuclear hot flash and come back and run your little car over several times with that big ol' Hummer. :heh

Yeah true story.

Anybody else?

[HeavenlyBri77]

I had a hot flash with this last pregnancy. I thought I was going to die. :panic

[Dee]

I had a nuclear hot flash the other day in Walmart and thought maybe everyone ELSE around me was going to die. :heh

If you see an older woman in a Super Walmart in the frozen food section with a freezer door open and leaning inside and waving her hand back and forth in front of her face and fluffing her shirt up and down with the other hand then immediately stop dead still! Pretend she is a lion who has just brought down prey and is guarding it.

Make no eye contact. Slowly, very slowly begin to back away all the while keeping a watchful eye. For goodness sake don't turn around and run. :fear

And whatever you do.....please do NOT make any faces, smart remarks or gestures. She might chase you down and snap your neck like a chicken or if you're in a state where conceal carry permits are abundant she might just shoot you so she doesn't have to move away from that wonderfully cold air coming from the freezer. :heh

It's better to just pretend you didn't see it and back away and go on with your shopping and forget you ever saw anything. :nod

[graceforme]

I saw a little lady wearing a T-shirt that said, "BACK OFF - I'm out of estrogen and I have a gun." Thought that one was good, and possibly true.

[whisper]

I saw a little lady wearing a T-shirt that said, "BACK OFF - I'm out of estrogen and I have a gun." Thought that one was good, and possibly true.

:lol2:lol2Where was that t-shirt when I needed it??:hehee That's just how I felt most of the time (for years) and thankfully I'm passed all that now. Phew!

[Christy]

LOL - HILARIOUS!!!! :aha

[Adoration]

I saw a little lady wearing a T-shirt that said, "BACK OFF - I'm out of estrogen and I have a gun." Thought that one was good, and possibly true.

:aha:pound

[Betty]

I can handle the hot flashes, it is the mood swings that drive me crazy. I can go from happy to mad to crying in just a few minutes. I am like movie in 60 seconds.:gaah

[Dee]

I saw a little lady wearing a T-shirt that said, "BACK OFF - I'm out of estrogen and I have a gun." Thought that one was good, and possibly true.

:pound I have a bumper sticker on my rear window that says:

WARNING: Menopausal Gun Owner. :heh

[Dee]

:lol2:lol2Where was that t-shirt when I needed it??:hehee That's just how I felt most of the time (for years) and thankfully I'm passed all that now. Phew!

Wish I was. I correspond with a friend of mine who's embedded in Iraq with the troops. Back in 2005 he was in Mosul with Deuce Four Stryker Brigade.

When they first got there they had lots of insurgents/terrorists to deal with.

We talked often. Once when we talked I was having a nuclear hot flash and had raging hormones.

I proposed to him to round up about 30,000 good old redneck women raised on guns who were menopausal and Iraq would be under control in no time.

I then wrote a 20-25 page story about such a unit being over there and the alert siren going off and some hormonal, mad, menopausal woman gets woken up and is REALLY mad and her half dressed, hair sticking up on one side and smushed on the other stalking across the hot sand after a fleeing terrorist crawling on his knees screaming for allah to help save him from the demon women and the woman saying, "Don't make me have to chase you. It's hot out here. This sand is hot. I'm hot. If you make me chase you it's just going to be worse for you." etc. etc. edited because of content not suitable for RR Board.

They were called the "Bama Redneck B Brigade".

Basically, he thought it was hilarious. He then passed it out to the guys in Deuce Four who then passed it around and next thing I know I've got almost 400 emails in my email box from guys all over Iraq telling me it was the funniest thing they've read in a while. :pound