Shayna
May 16th, 2008, 08:16 PM
Hello RR,
I'm a new member but have occassionally read the forums on RR for a few years now. I was raised as a Jew, bat-mitzvahed, the whole nine yards. I then became rather agnostic and wasn't going to temple for a while, and then nothing for a very long while.
About eight years ago, I started going to church at a mega-congregation with a neighbor of mine because I liked her and didn't want to offend -- and we had the most fantastic lunches afterward. I went, I listened, and I paid my respects, I thought - no harm in that. However, like in temple, I didn't feel a real connection. I felt it was mostly about getting money from the members and not really about feeding souls.
After about a year, the pastor of that church went on vacation for a few weeks, and another pastor came to cover. At the same time, my neighbor's schedule changed and she and I weren't attending the same service. The visiting pastor had a completely different focus and there was a call to come to Jesus. Suddenly, the Messiah that I had spent my childhood learning about that one day He would come, I realized that He already had come for His people and offered His Salvation to everyone. It was so crystalline that even now, retelling it, I am getting goosebumps. :)
Anyway, I think without the distraction of my neighbor and the other pastor, I was able to hear that still small voice. I accepted Jesus Christ that day in March 2003.
Since that time, I've moved away from that church, and then later that city to a new place across the country. I wanted a fresh start after the hurricanes of 2004-2005, so I relocated to somewhere that does not get that kind of weather. I'm still looking for a home church. I thought I found one here, when I first arrived, but they started getting very possessive and controlling. I left that church when one Sunday I missed a service, the pastor called and I didn't answer, so he sent some church elders to break into my home, ostensibly to look for me. However, they also looked at other things I had in my home closely enough to comment on why I had bought expensive perfume when there are missionaries who could have better used those funds, etc.
I am still a believer but between my Jewish background and bad experiences, it's been hard for me to find a church that feels safe. I've been to some churches that tell me to forget I was ever Jewish, and then to other churches that embarrass me by holding me out as some kind of poster child.
Anyway, I'm here to listen, to learn, and hopefully have something valuable to share. Mostly though, I'm here to learn how to grow in my faith in what I hope is a safe space.
Thanks for listening. :)
I'm a new member but have occassionally read the forums on RR for a few years now. I was raised as a Jew, bat-mitzvahed, the whole nine yards. I then became rather agnostic and wasn't going to temple for a while, and then nothing for a very long while.
About eight years ago, I started going to church at a mega-congregation with a neighbor of mine because I liked her and didn't want to offend -- and we had the most fantastic lunches afterward. I went, I listened, and I paid my respects, I thought - no harm in that. However, like in temple, I didn't feel a real connection. I felt it was mostly about getting money from the members and not really about feeding souls.
After about a year, the pastor of that church went on vacation for a few weeks, and another pastor came to cover. At the same time, my neighbor's schedule changed and she and I weren't attending the same service. The visiting pastor had a completely different focus and there was a call to come to Jesus. Suddenly, the Messiah that I had spent my childhood learning about that one day He would come, I realized that He already had come for His people and offered His Salvation to everyone. It was so crystalline that even now, retelling it, I am getting goosebumps. :)
Anyway, I think without the distraction of my neighbor and the other pastor, I was able to hear that still small voice. I accepted Jesus Christ that day in March 2003.
Since that time, I've moved away from that church, and then later that city to a new place across the country. I wanted a fresh start after the hurricanes of 2004-2005, so I relocated to somewhere that does not get that kind of weather. I'm still looking for a home church. I thought I found one here, when I first arrived, but they started getting very possessive and controlling. I left that church when one Sunday I missed a service, the pastor called and I didn't answer, so he sent some church elders to break into my home, ostensibly to look for me. However, they also looked at other things I had in my home closely enough to comment on why I had bought expensive perfume when there are missionaries who could have better used those funds, etc.
I am still a believer but between my Jewish background and bad experiences, it's been hard for me to find a church that feels safe. I've been to some churches that tell me to forget I was ever Jewish, and then to other churches that embarrass me by holding me out as some kind of poster child.
Anyway, I'm here to listen, to learn, and hopefully have something valuable to share. Mostly though, I'm here to learn how to grow in my faith in what I hope is a safe space.
Thanks for listening. :)