Funny Sayings and mottos

[HSmomto4]

When you lay down with dogs, you get up with fleas--Southern Proverb

And I too was told as a child "beauty must suffer" as my Mother ripped the hairbrush through my knee length hair!

[Hootmon]

You never really learn much from hearing yourself talk. George ClooneyThat's especially true in his case...

[jadeeyes]

Here's one of my favorites:

A closed mouth gathers no feet.

[Lisababy]

And I too was told as a child "beauty must suffer" as my Mother ripped the hairbrush through my knee length hair!

My Grandma's was "Beauty knows no pain". She always said this when she was brushing the tangles out of my hair. :cry

My mom used to say something similar: "You have to suffer to be beautiful."


my daughter is just like i was when i was younger, she won't let me brush her hair often because it's curly and gets tangled easily. So far, i have refrained from using that quote. not to say i didn't want to..... i'm just not ready to turn completely into my mother yet! :aha

[No2Flesh]

Steve Martin:

I saw the movie, 'Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon' and I was surprised because I didn't see any tigers or dragons. And then I realised why: they're crouching and hidden.

Rodney Dangerfield:

I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.

Tommy Cooper:

I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'

[No2Flesh]

That's especially true in his case...

LOL! amen.:aha

[lisaann]

That's especially true in his case...

:nod :pound



The early bird might get the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese.

[Wally]

Al Right Lisaann. More cheeze. :aha:aha:aha


If at first you don't succeed;


You're doing it wrong.

Read the directions.

Get a bigger hammer.

Get a 9mm circular wrench.

Don't waste any more time on it.

Get someone else to take the blame.

Tell everyone you're success challenged.

Righty tighty, lefty loosey. Unless it's a mower blade.




When in doubt, the claymore is pointed towards you.

Never disect a joke, it dies on the table - Johnny Carson

[abidinginvine]

When a woman came up to Winston Churchill at a party and said, "Sir, you're drunk!", he responded, "Abd you, madam, are ugly....but in the morning I shall be sober!" :aha

[No2Flesh]

Baghdad Bob April 6, 2003

"Whenever we attack, they retreat. When we pound them with missiles and heavy artillery, they retreat even deeper. But when we stopped pounding, they pushed to the airport for propaganda purposes."

" What they say about a breakthrough [in Najaf] is completely an illusion. They are sending their warplanes to fly very low in order to have vibrations on these sacred places... they are trying to crack the buildings by flying low over them."

" Saddam Hussein's soldiers and his great forces gave the Americans a lesson which will not be forgotten by history. Truly."