4 year old whiner

[lyngraphics]

ahhhh! My son is 4-1/2 and all of a sudden has developed this whiny attitude. We try not to pay attention when he does this, and just let him whine until he is done and can ask for what he wants in a normal voice.... but it is driving us crazy!! Any advice? I would really hate for my daughter (2) to pick up on this behavior.

[lisaann]

You need to make sure that he understands exactly "what" whining is and then make it very clear that he is not allowed to do it again. If he continues to whine then he is disobeying you and is in need of punishment to bring him back under your authority. :hug

[Jacksmom]

it seems like when children do that, that they want more attention, i wonder maybe he thinks your two year old gets more attention that he does? just a thought, obvouisly (sp)? two year olds need more attention than someone almost five but five year olds do not realize this maybe have a play date just you & him & see if it works just a thought

[lyngraphics]

Thanks for the ideas! I do try to give him the same amount of attention... I have been trying to figure out what he needs or wants by talking to him. I think he may not be liking his new class at daycare (which he will be out of the beginning of next year as we are homeschooling him! :yeah:yeah:yeah) For some strange reason his teacher is so intent on having him color inside the lines, while I just let him "go at it!" :heh I think she gets onto him for other things as well. I am not so worried about him learning at school as I teach him what he should know now and I don't stress about the things he seems to be struggling with (handwriting) and focus more on what he is good at. He loves science, nature, bugs and learning Spanish and sign language, so that is what we focus on now. Maybe he is just bored at school? :idunno

[Lisababy]

my 4 year old daughter does the same thing. She is very whiny. Like you, I have tried to ignore it and basically not give her whatever it is that she is whining for until she asks in a "big girl" voice. She does not like to be called a "baby" and one thing i have noticed that helps is that when she is whining, I remind her that "only babies whine and I can't understand whiners but that I know she is a big girl and I need her to ask in a big girl voice before I can help her."

She usually picks up on that and asks in a normal voice for what she wants. Not sure if it will work for you but it's worth a shot....

[Xian]

Whine back LOL

[phyrehart]

Whine back LOL

hehehe.. :)
I watched that nanny show where the nanny with an English accent had to deal with a child that was really bad with the whining.
She told the parents to work with the child to really get to know what the child wants.. Then tell the child you hear that he/she wants ....... Make sure your very clear that you make sure that you let the child know you do understand but that your answer is no. Its OK to whine too but he/she will have to into a time out until it's done.
Just something I saw.. :)

when my son was 4 he played me big time between his grandma and I. He would be with me for the week and then tell his Grandma that I never fed him lol.. She was my ex husband mom so we didn't really get along.. boy did that feed fuel to the fire lol :)

Good luck with your baby :)
They are so very precious!!!

Debbie

[Lisa in OK]

my 4 year old daughter does the same thing. She is very whiny. Like you, I have tried to ignore it and basically not give her whatever it is that she is whining for until she asks in a "big girl" voice. She does not like to be called a "baby" and one thing i have noticed that helps is that when she is whining, I remind her that "only babies whine and I can't understand whiners but that I know she is a big girl and I need her to ask in a big girl voice before I can help her."

She usually picks up on that and asks in a normal voice for what she wants. Not sure if it will work for you but it's worth a shot....

This is what my parents did when I was little and whiny. If I didn't ask in a normal voice, I was ignored. I'd like to think it worked. I would double check with my husband but . . . lol :)

[LookingUplinda]

my 4 year old daughter does the same thing. She is very whiny. Like you, I have tried to ignore it and basically not give her whatever it is that she is whining for until she asks in a "big girl" voice. She does not like to be called a "baby" and one thing i have noticed that helps is that when she is whining, I remind her that "only babies whine and I can't understand whiners but that I know she is a big girl and I need her to ask in a big girl voice before I can help her."

She usually picks up on that and asks in a normal voice for what she wants. Not sure if it will work for you but it's worth a shot....
off topic, just got lost in yer 'star gazer' lily avitar:nod, can almost smell it!!! So beautiful!!

[Lisababy]

off topic, just got lost in yer 'star gazer' lily avitar:nod, can almost smell it!!! So beautiful!!

mmmm, they are my favorite too, i love how they make the whole room smell!!!