pegmo
July 6th, 2007, 09:51 PM
I have a niece getting married in the Catholic church in October. She has been living with the man she is now engaged to for a year or two. He has a daughter from a previous live in relationship. He is thinking of converting to the Catholic faith.
This niece is one of several in the family who are living with their current boyfriend/girlfriend, so its fairly common in the family. No one seems to think its a negative - just the way it is. I spoke to one nephew who told me what his choice was, but I have not spoken to this relative or her mother about the choice, so I don't think think they are aware of my Christian viewpoint. Our family became Christians about 3 years ago, so we are the only Christians on both sides of an extensive Catholic family. Some in the family know we have had transformed lives but others do not since we don't see them as often.
MY sister-in-law, my nieces mother, has asked me to help plan a wedding shower for the couple. However, I really am troubled about sponsoring a wedding shower for this couple since they have been living together. I don't want to appear to support their living choice, nor to be seen as going against God in any way. They don't appear to need anything to set up their home, since that has already been done - so I think its being thrown as part of the typical wedding custom. I am happy they have decided to marry, so think this is the right decision.
How have others dealt with the situations around couples living together before marriage? Do you think I am being too much of a stickler if I decline to sponsor the shower, but still attend the wedding? For some reason, I don't think I would feel the same to just attend the shower, but I didn't want to host it since it seems to carry a different connotation.
Do you think this is a good time to witness in anyway on this topic and if so, how have you or would you approach it? Or would you just participate and not ruffle any feathers?:idunno
Just looking for some general reaction. I haven't been invited to showers for couples planning to live together but not get married, but I wouldn't be surprised if that were next!
This niece is one of several in the family who are living with their current boyfriend/girlfriend, so its fairly common in the family. No one seems to think its a negative - just the way it is. I spoke to one nephew who told me what his choice was, but I have not spoken to this relative or her mother about the choice, so I don't think think they are aware of my Christian viewpoint. Our family became Christians about 3 years ago, so we are the only Christians on both sides of an extensive Catholic family. Some in the family know we have had transformed lives but others do not since we don't see them as often.
MY sister-in-law, my nieces mother, has asked me to help plan a wedding shower for the couple. However, I really am troubled about sponsoring a wedding shower for this couple since they have been living together. I don't want to appear to support their living choice, nor to be seen as going against God in any way. They don't appear to need anything to set up their home, since that has already been done - so I think its being thrown as part of the typical wedding custom. I am happy they have decided to marry, so think this is the right decision.
How have others dealt with the situations around couples living together before marriage? Do you think I am being too much of a stickler if I decline to sponsor the shower, but still attend the wedding? For some reason, I don't think I would feel the same to just attend the shower, but I didn't want to host it since it seems to carry a different connotation.
Do you think this is a good time to witness in anyway on this topic and if so, how have you or would you approach it? Or would you just participate and not ruffle any feathers?:idunno
Just looking for some general reaction. I haven't been invited to showers for couples planning to live together but not get married, but I wouldn't be surprised if that were next!