Resisting the flesh

[Issachar]

Get Involved
Set an Example
Listen, talk, give God's opinion (read the Bible)
Share your experiences
Apologize
Be Fair
Allow them to come to the conclusion.
Love each one 100%
Make a sacrifice that they may be blessed
Buy your daughters a rose on Valentines day.
Take your son fishing.
Find a game that they can win sometines, like chinese checkers
Shoot your TV or at least cut the cable.
Love their mother.

Most Important: Go to your secret place and pray for each child. All so very good Wally. I underlined a few that work very well with the following .... Starting when the children were around 7 or 8, I would take them, on a rotating basis, out to breakfast, one at a time on the Saturday morning following payday ... every two weeks. So I would have them, one on one, with no tee vee, 'puter, telephone, other kids' questions ... NO INTERRUPTIONS. We would talk about EVERYTHING. I let them talk a lot. Then we would walk in a nearby park. There was no time limit. It usually ended up being around 3-4 hours. This was in addition to "family time" which was two steps ... always having supper together (my kids told me they didn't know any families that did that any more :ohno ) and, in the evening when homework was done, we would all sit in the living room and talk and laugh, joke, play a game, occassionally watch a movie (Christian mostly), etc. When they became teenagers, it was barely noticable. By then, it was totally normal to communicate about anything. Sometimes I wondered if I was too strict concerning telephone use, dating, etc. But I guess it was fine, looking back. (Hey, one doesn't know how to raise kids until one is done. :) ) As I stated earlier in this thread, I still have two at home. What a VERY DIFFERENT WORLD from ten years ago!

I underlined and bolded a VERY key point you made Wally about "Love their mother". Sadly not all are in the situation needed to do that (i.e. death, divorce, etc.) but if possible, DO THAT. It is THE best sex education your children can receive.

And of course, I underlined, bolded and italicized the best thing that all of us can do.

Issachar

[Issachar]

Asking for another route isn't the answer, you can't control who will be on that. All you can control is your actions This is a profound statement, imho. It is a concise way to say a LOT about our walk in Christ. Thanks.

Issachar

[No2Flesh]

We recently began to have a family devotion.
It has really brought us closer together but most importantly
it has made it more natural to discuss God together in our home.
We pray together, holding hands.

Matthew 18:20
For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.

I put the 2 oldest girls in charge of music.
Afterwards we play a game or do something as a family.
Im teaching them whatever the Holy Spirit seems to suggest.
Now not only are the kids learning more from the Bible but so are we, or being reminded of things we knew.
Sometimes we may change the day we have it because of
something coming up but Im going to make sure we keep doing this weekly.

As a man and the spiritual leader of my family I should have been doing this long ago. Better late than never.

On the subject of lust Im getting better at looking away, such as when there was a female jogger yesterday and several other chances to ogle.

Tommorow I will deliver the meal, after praying, and handle it the way God would have me to.

PS: Thanks Wally, great tips. Some I hadnt thought of.
Well said Raptureme, although we cant control what a woman wears
we can control how we react to it.

[Issachar]

it has made it more natural to discuss God together in our home. Hallelujah! :) And THAT is what you want. You said, "better late than never". Amen.

This "training up of our children in the ways of the Lord" is what is going to give them the wherewithall to resist the flesh when they are grown. It will be an incessant battle while on the earth, but in Christ, through faith and knowledge of the Word, we can have victory. Some of this is in an essay I wrote some time ago called, "Victorious Secrets". :)

Issachar

[No2Flesh]

Issachar, I searched the forum for "Victorious Secrets" but nothing came up.
Maybe you could post it here or give me a link.
I would like to read it.


Yes it feels very good to not be letting my children down by
neglecting their spiritual welfare anymore. We have both noticed quite a difference in our teen (and us too) already since making changes in our lives centered around God and His Word.
We think she will soon muster up the courage, finally, to get baptized.

This is all very, very encouraging to me.

Thank God, He is worthy of all praise
and all the credit is due Him.

[pulpmethod2]

Lust is a phyisical desire, God made man and women. Your desire is natural.

What's important is that you do not act on it or dwell on it in your mind, or use it as stimulating thought during masturbation.

Be strong, you have nothing to be guilty for as far as I can see.

Asking for another route isn't the answer, you can't control who will be on that. All you can control is your actions

I don't want to derail this thread, but since this was mentioned I would like to know if (in context) this statement is saying that it's "okay" as long as no stimulating thought is used.

[Issachar]

I'm not sure what was meant by that comment; I was just hoping it was not worded well.

Masturbation is a type of adultery imho. Why? Because sex is supposed to be between a man and his wife; ONLY. With someone else, it's adultery even if that "someone else" is self.

Issachar

[No2Flesh]

I thought it was ok as long as I only thought of my wife.:idunno

Like when she had a headache or during that certain week.:doh

[pulpmethod2]

I'm not sure what was meant by that comment; I was just hoping it was not worded well.

Masturbation is a type of adultery imho. Why? Because sex is supposed to be between a man and his wife; ONLY. With someone else, it's adultery even if that "someone else" is self.

Issachar

Thank you for that clarification Issachar.

[Wally]

Well the Bible may not specifically mention masturbation, but there are illustrations of conduct that we can use.

Judah's daughter in law Tamar was supposed to be cared for by Onan upon his brother's Er's death, but he emitted on the ground and would die by God's hand.

Concubines were provided to travelers. Harlots charged for their services and yet continued in their trade. Some of the conduct was clarely wrong, some undesirable, some appeared sanctioned.

Paul would admonish belivers in Corinth to abstain because of the troubles they were facing. But he also did not want them pushed beyond their limits.

I know from friends that diabeties can kill one's love life. And the spouse then has to cope. God makes provisions, the stength to abstain, or the ability to give to the other, and any couple needs to talk through those kinds of issues. A man's physiology is different from a woman's so God's provision can be different.

Young men will be facing trying times as they mature and are confronted with girls-made-to-be-women splashed everywhere. I know a young man's dreams can run wild at night.

Jesus said even to look on a woman with lustful thoughts is adultry. (With another man it's an abomination - not adultry.)
It's my belief that adultry can hit anyone, espceially those thinking they are impervious. Just about every man is convicted by this verse which should humble us and drive us to seeking God's way of dealing with this particular temptation. For me, some days are golden, and others are right in the middle of an artillery barrage. I've been wounded, and I have drug the wounded off the battlefield and then run back on.

It's not easy, but I've made the life long committment - Jesus, I want to do it your way. Teach me. Then the shooting starts again.

If anyone has tools to share, please add to this series. Issachar?