Cait
July 12th, 2007, 08:39 PM
Hi everyone. I sort of mentioned this in another thread, but I've been thinking and talkng about it with my mom today, and my ideas are more fully developed now.
My mom and i were baptised yesterday :yeah and afterwards we went to hear a message about the endtimes. My mom and I have had so heavy issues come up for us as individuals in the last few years, and both of our problems came to a head in the last few weeks. For her it was marital issues, for me it was issues with the family on my father's side.
We were both praying before the baptism, and afterwards, during the message, I felt this increadible heaviness in my body. Like if I had been chased, i could not make myself move faster than a walk. After communion and leaving the church, the heaviness greatly decreased, so i was not going to mention it. BUt something (or someone:rolleyes) compelled me to. I told my mom how I had felt, her eyes got big, and she told me se had felt it too, except it was, according to her, as if something had reached inside her and inflated her heart.
I thought it was an incredible shared moment yesterday, but the significance of it truly blossomed today.
I have had a bad relationship fr years with much of my family. I reached out, but was slapped down many times. This gets drainign, but I thought I HAD to. But then, from three sources, I heard the same advice, that it was time I shook the dust from my feet and left. Today i decided to follow that advice, because the anguish of familial rejection is a tremendously heavy weight on my heart. It very literally made my mind run in circles, but today I heard in my heart: "be still" And I will be.
And now when I think about it, the weight I felt on my body in church felt like a giant hand holding my to the floor, also saying "be still."
Likewise for my mom - her loving emotions have been draining for a long time due to problems with her husband. She said to me that her "love bank account was bankrupt" and that she needed a deposit. THat's what I prayed for for her, and I'm sure she prayed the same.
Then in the church, her heart felt like it swole up. Today she says she feels stronger, and I've seen her - she looks and acts stronger.
God's ways are so amazing. I never thought something this incredible was "for me" but God has done something for both of us, and we may never truly understand or appreciate it's extent.
Praise be to God, the most High!!
My mom and i were baptised yesterday :yeah and afterwards we went to hear a message about the endtimes. My mom and I have had so heavy issues come up for us as individuals in the last few years, and both of our problems came to a head in the last few weeks. For her it was marital issues, for me it was issues with the family on my father's side.
We were both praying before the baptism, and afterwards, during the message, I felt this increadible heaviness in my body. Like if I had been chased, i could not make myself move faster than a walk. After communion and leaving the church, the heaviness greatly decreased, so i was not going to mention it. BUt something (or someone:rolleyes) compelled me to. I told my mom how I had felt, her eyes got big, and she told me se had felt it too, except it was, according to her, as if something had reached inside her and inflated her heart.
I thought it was an incredible shared moment yesterday, but the significance of it truly blossomed today.
I have had a bad relationship fr years with much of my family. I reached out, but was slapped down many times. This gets drainign, but I thought I HAD to. But then, from three sources, I heard the same advice, that it was time I shook the dust from my feet and left. Today i decided to follow that advice, because the anguish of familial rejection is a tremendously heavy weight on my heart. It very literally made my mind run in circles, but today I heard in my heart: "be still" And I will be.
And now when I think about it, the weight I felt on my body in church felt like a giant hand holding my to the floor, also saying "be still."
Likewise for my mom - her loving emotions have been draining for a long time due to problems with her husband. She said to me that her "love bank account was bankrupt" and that she needed a deposit. THat's what I prayed for for her, and I'm sure she prayed the same.
Then in the church, her heart felt like it swole up. Today she says she feels stronger, and I've seen her - she looks and acts stronger.
God's ways are so amazing. I never thought something this incredible was "for me" but God has done something for both of us, and we may never truly understand or appreciate it's extent.
Praise be to God, the most High!!