My husband is getting snippy on me lately

[Pucci]

I have always been a "nice" person all my life. Never start arguements with anybody, not difficult, always agreeable and friendly, no confrontations etc. And when I met my husband he was more or less the same way.

But I noticed that my husband has been getting snippy with me lately. First I thought it was because of us being in the middle of a move and all the stress that goes with it. But now that we have moved and everything is settled, there are times when he says these remarks or the way he says something sounds rude or snippy.

For example, last night at 2 am in the morning, our 15 month old woke up crying hysterically in the middle of the night. I went to get him and found he had a bleeding nose and he was rubbing his face with his hands and getting blood all over his face. So I picked him up and brought him into our room and laid him on the bed, went to wet some paper towels to clean his face. My husband picked him up and started to walk him and comfort him so that he would calm down and stop crying. As he is doing this I am following along side trying to clean the blood off his face. This is making him cry even louder. So my husband gets frustrated with me and says "stop stop stop stop"

This made me feel awful. I don't know maybe I am just too sensitive and should just understand his frustration. After all it was 2 am in the morning and here is this screaming kid waking us up.

I don't know why I feel this way but he never used to talk to me this way before. And I don't have the guts to tell him to back off( because I have a passive personality). Don't get me wrong, my husband is not mean or anything and is actually nice, but just lately he has had these little outbursts.

Is this what usually happens when couples have kids?

[Betty]

The best thing you can do is talk to him when you are both calm. We have been married since 1970. For most of our married life, I kept my mouth shut and let my husband walk over me. In the last couple of years, I have learned to wait to a moment when we are talking peacefully and then tell him things that he does that hurt me. You should not bomb with him with to much at once and you should also give him a chance to tell you what you do that bugs him.
Communication is a good way of workig out differences. Truth is when we live for someone there will always be things that another person bugs us. Pick your battles. Some things we can live with. One thing that he used to do was in a heat of fighting, threaten to leave me. One day I did not even wait until I was calm, I just flat out asked him, if he knew how much that comment cut me to my heart. He was shocked. He stopped doing that.
Good luck.
betty

[lisaann]

I agree with Betty. :) When the time is right for a calm conversation ask him what you are doing to bug him. It could be that something else is going on that has nothing to do with you but as his wife you end up getting the brunt of his anger. Been there done that myself. :hug

[markofthebest]

Lack of sleep can make for mean bedfellows.

[mamacags]

grind up midol and slip it in his eggs.

[Cd4u]

sounds like lack of sleep and unable to handle a crying baby combined (some people can not stand the sound of a baby crying). I would leave it alone and let him calm the baby down, then clean up later.

or he could be depressed if you are noticing more outburst more than ever

[countmeworthy]

:pound :pound grind up midol and slip it in his eggs.:pound :pound

[TheGiggler]

I am sorry that you feel this way. I was you 15 years ago. Talk to him
Communicaate communicate communicate. You have feelings that he needs to know about and maybe he has feelings you beed to know about.
Get a sitter for a night and have good chat with him.

[lisaann]

I know some men get jealous of a new baby. The time and love that you used to shower on him is now directed at the baby. He might be feeling left out. :idunno

[whisper]

I agree that you need to talk to him. He may be under more stress than you realize and unaware of his behavioral changes. A move and a baby are major events in a couple's life. My husband use to be a very impatient man and would act as you describe your husband. As much as I wanted to get right back in his face I forced myself to remain calm and that would calm him down. You need to get a handle on this soon before you withdrawn emotionally to protect yourself from being hurt. Lay your heart out for him. Tell him the changes you see, how it hurts you and stress your concern about what has been going on. God bless!