Your church may be emergent if thread.

[icebear]

if your church offers courses on the kama sutra, it might be emergent

[OnceWasLost]

If the sermon uses the terms: Relevant, Conversation, Purpose, Missional, Incarnational or Christs Follower, you may be Emergent.

If your pastor uses any number of hip sounding terms, and speaks for 45 minutes, yet still manages to say nothing, you are emergent.

If you have people defend you for never presenting the Gospel, you may be emergent.

[m2pinggggggg]

If the sermon uses the terms: Relevant, Conversation, Purpose, Missional, Incarnational or Christs Follower, you may be Emergent.

If your pastor uses any number of hip sounding terms, and speaks for 45 minutes, yet still manages to say nothing, you are emergent.

If you have people defend you for never presenting the Gospel, you may be emergent.

I guess I did get in the right Church.

[Nightelf]

IF.... and these things are all happening at the church I was going to for a little while......

1. Your house church spends half the time talking about everybody's week, and the second half watching a NOOMA video, then answering the questions that come with said video...

2. Nobody cracks open a Bible at the house church

3. Women bring their knitting to house church and confess they left their Bible in the trunk of the car... but hey, they don't need it anyway!

4. The monthly "Corporate Worship" service is held in a gymnasium and everyone sits at round tables and drinks coffee and eats baked goods during the service

5. The book table prominently features copies of The Shack for sale

6. The pastor talks about how church members share their dreams with him, and these dreams "confirm the message" he is about to preach

7. The pastor often asks for members to share a "word of prophecy"

8. If and when the gospel is ever mentioned, repentance and conversion are absent from the message.

[Anddra]

if your church offers courses on the kama sutra, it might be emergent

Might be? More like "Definitely is". But surely this isn't actually happening anywhere. Is it?

[icebear]

Might be? More like "Definitely is". But surely this isn't actually happening anywhere. Is it?

(well, "might be" was sorta sarcastic) but i remember i did read an article where there was a church doing this... saying that Christianity was prudish and that 'we' could learn a lot from such things...

[Lainy68]

(well, "might be" was sorta sarcastic) but i remember i did read an article where there was a church doing this... saying that Christianity was prudish and that 'we' could learn a lot from such things...

...but CERTAINLY NOT FROM THERE! I'm a prude. I'm totally embarrassed. Do some people not have a modicum of modesty?

[icebear]

if your pastor writes his sermons based only on the red letters.....


if your deacons walk up the aisles bashing their foreheads with a plank of wood while chanting..... they might be part of a monty python skit as well as being emergent......




if your pastor has a nickname that comes from a national lampoon movie........

[Teotwawki]

if your pastor writes his sermons based only on the red letters.....

I don't know about that one; most of Revelation is red letters. Liberal Christians aren't too fond of Revelation.

[His Bride]

I don't know about that one; most of Revelation is red letters. Liberal Christians aren't too fond of Revelation.

Very Good Point!!!!!!! Liberal Christians typically are Dominionists or Preterists.

[icebear]

I don't know about that one; most of Revelation is red letters. Liberal Christians aren't too fond of Revelation.

http://www.rr-bb.com/showthread.php?...ter+christians

[Anddra]

[Nightelf]

If you email a church and ask how to be saved and they never answer your email, they might be emergent.

Yes, I did this.

I recently emailed Rob Bell's church (Mars Hill Bible Church) and asked them what I had to do to go to heaven, and if there really was a hell. That was months ago, and nobody ever replied. Either they are "too busy" for "unimportant emails" like that, or, because they feel the questions were irrelevant, they weren't worth answering.

[Lainy68]

Your church might be emergent if there is an emo screen behind the pulpit--but no cross in sight.

[Cherished]

If a deer runs into your church windows and splatters blood all over, and some say that it is prophetic...you may be emergent.

If your pastor agrees, and/or encourages dialogue, you may be emergent...

[His Bride]

If a deer runs into your church windows and splatters blood all over, and some say that it is prophetic...you may be emergent.

If your pastor agrees, and/or encourages dialogue, you may be emergent...

and it really happened, didn't it?

[Cherished]

and it really happened, didn't it?

[Cherished]

If you are not sure of what repentance is, but you do know all 34 flavors of specialty coffees your church offers, .....you may be emergent.

If you think that the Good News is that Sunday service is canceled for the football game...you may be emergent.

[His Bride]

If you are not sure of what repentance is, but you do know all 34 flavors of specialty coffees your church offers, .....you may be emergent.

If you think that the Good News is that Sunday service is canceled for the football game...you may be emergent.

[Cherished]

They just came to me, I had to share!