I some wonderfully good things happened to me today and I figured who better to share with than my new RR family! Take a seat.
First a little background: I'm a childhood cancer patient, which only means my cancer began at childhood. As a result of enduring cancer treatments I lost a significant amount of mental processing speed. I have the intelligence of a college senior, but the processing speed of a 5th grader. As one may imagine, it has made college hard. A degree that would usually take 2 years, will probably take me 6 -that sort of thing.
So, this semester I was put in a tense situation. I have the capacity to take maybe 2 courses at a time, but for the sake of extending my insurance I had to enroll full-time. I ended up having to take FIVE courses.
I got away with only taking 4 (still very ). This semester was awful. I had 4 separate agendas to follow, including a science course which involved a quick pace and lots of memory. I had flares in the syndrome I have which equates itself to severe depression, pessimistic perspective, everything. :/
Now, it's Finals week. I was looking at my ending grades and realized I have failed my science course, which was a great disappointment. It would mean I'd have to take it again and about $700 went out the window! I also am very hard on myself, due to military upbringing and my intelligence (a gift from God I have treasured and mourned over since the early deterioration of it through health problems.). I fell into pieces when I was sure I had failed! Another reminder that I would never have a normal life because of ailments. Anyway, today was the exam. I didn't know any of the material. I prayed over the test before picking up the pencil. The course was sternly taught, but I was absent a few days and had troubles working with the professor to accommodate my disabilities. So, I filled in all the blanks, turned it in and approached my instructor to discuss my margins. She looked at me strangely when I told her I was failing her class. We looked at the grades together and she showed me that I needed ONE MORE POINT FOR a B+!!!! ohmygosh! Before even grading the exam, extra credit points or previous quiz, I had already passed and with %79! There were miscalculations I and the computer had made and I was mistaken.
First praise: This girl with this damaged mind went against seemingly impossible academic odds, struggled with my toughest subject : science, and is coming out with a B!!!! Once I got in the car I called my mortal dad and excitedly told him the good news, but when I got in the car I thanked my immortal Dad who without I could not had done it. Thank you, Lord!!! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for giving me things I don't deserve and being among me everyday and looking after this young lady!
Second praise report! <3
A little background:
Earlier in the year, I has considering starting the evangelism pupil program at my church. It's called "Got LIFE?", maybe some of you have heard of it. So, I attended the first meeting/ introduction lesson I got the books and workbook and they laid out the program for us. I got overwhelmed, it was not something I could do along side the course load I talked about above. I didn't feel it was a direction God was holding me to. I plugged out for this GOT LIFE? session and hope to start again this summer. Well, the first night the pastor gave us one little booklet to give to one person within a week. It was an intricate tiny Gospel tract booklet, that detailed much of the history of the Bible, the Gospel message, and the science in a presentable fashion. Anyway, I took the mission to heart. I thought "ONE gospel tract, I can do that." , even if I didn't continue the program.
That was 3 months ago, I still had the booklet today. I told myself "I'm not giving up!". I had a study partner in science; she is a middle-aged woman,driven single mom battling a reoccurring genetic skin cancer with a troubled son. I carried around that booklet in case God opened up an opportunity to give it away. I decided to give the tract to my study partner (I'll call her "Dee") after one day we were waiting around after class. I met up with her after she went for a smoke and as we were walking to eat a snack, she profaned God's Holy Name..twice.
I kindly asked her, "Dee, do you mind if you don't say that?"
Dee: "Say what?"
Me: "Can you please not use God's Name in vain? He is very dear to me."
She covered her mouth and said "Oh I'm sorry. I cuss. I won't say it."
"Thank you very much." I replied.
I decided then she is the one I am giving the little booklet too.
We studied together a few times and I figured a moment would open up for me to hand it to her, but the flow was never right. But today as I woke up for the last class we had together; I looked at the booklet and said "It's going today!" (3 months later) lol. I was on guard though, I know how the Devil dislikes these things. The booklet had been through quite a bit as I carried it around with me the last 3 months. It had gotten wet, the front was kinda wrinkly. It had been exposed to the cold. It almost got torn, buried under clothes and bins, forgotten. You get the point.
The evil one tried to whisper, he did. Thoughts came in: "Maybe it's just no meant for me to give it to Dee", "It's in too bad a shape to give to anyone.", "Maybe it will ruin our partnership.", "Ugh, maybe I should just not go to class; I'm failing anyway." All of this came in. When I got to class, It continued for Dee had decided not to take the Final the same class period as me, which meant I had to find her in the building and catch her before the next class to give it to her. After the exam, I was held up and was afraid I was going to miss Dee, but I broke away and I found her. And the setting was perfect. She was in a good mood, in a social state. We discussed the exam and then I asked her if I could hand something to her:
Me: "Dee, I had began this program at my church. I hope to be an evangelist, so in a way I'm in training. I've been burdened by my pastor to hand out this little pamplet and you are one of the most reliable people I know... and hard-working. I feel you are someone I can trust to atleast look through the booklet, so it won't go to waste. Would you mind if I gave it to you?"
Dee smiled and said: "You think I'm reliable!?!," she laughed. "Sure. I could do that. Yeah!"
Me: "Dee, it means so much to me. Thank you for just taking it out of my hand. (if you read the evangelism thread you might get this )."
Dee inquired: "Not trying to be rude but what is it? What are evangelist? I never knew what that really is-meant."
I explained a bit on what evangelist do and we ended up chatting about how Christians are accepted less and less in American society. (I kindof missed the chance to better explain the Gospel here. I'm just starting out. ). I walked Dee to class and we had to split.
Praise report: I planted a seed today! It would take another day of writing to fully explain how significant this is, but I spread the good news a little and refused to be intimidated. I had the courage to do it, even after past discouragement when evangelizing. It was my first time giving out a Gospel tract and I did in what may have been my last chance to give it to Dee! I struggle with social withdrawal, I am still in therapy for and I wish I could fully explain how significant it was for me to break that barrier for my faith. Praise God for strength and courage! Praise God a seed may be planted in Dee and I pray it will develop into more! Praise God I didn't let the little booklet get left in the rain, or washed in my jeans, or buried under stuff in a bin! Praise God, He is good and a faithful, kind, enduring Master!
If you read this through, thank you so much for taking the time out to let me share this praise with you. Pray for my study partner to seek the Lord and that my little deed blooms to be much greater in her life!